Advanced Urban Survival Skills EVERYONE Should Have
Streets and public spaces in large cities present a vast set of dangers and threats, even in more civilized and safer countries.
by Fabian Ommar
Streets and public spaces in large cities present a vast set of dangers and threats, even in more civilized and safer countries. That’s because criminals, predators, and deranged and evil people are present in greater numbers in urban agglomerations; the higher density of people and infrastructure means more opportunities for lawbreakers.
That’s becoming more evident today with the masses of “cultural enrichers” invading North America, the UK, and mainland Europe. But that’s not all: people everywhere are also losing their minds, thanks to the crisis and instability, causing friction and violence to rise. I believe this mass insanity will get worse as time passes.
This time, I wanted to go beyond the typical “situational awareness” advice and provide more practical and direct actions to improve personal safety, navigate big city streets, and deal with various situations and unwanted players.
#1 – USEFUL LIES
It’s perfectly fine to lie and create distractions and misdirections when dealing with strangers. When staying silent isn’t an option, use as few words as necessary. The more we talk, the more we give away or complicate ourselves, so keep it short so as not to get trapped in complex stories or contradict yourself.
– Don’t reveal your address.
When an app or taxi driver asks if you “live here,” say, “No, I’m just visiting a friend.” If possible, ask them to stop a few meters before or after your destination, maybe walk a block or two if your sixth sense tells you something’s off.
– You’re never alone.
This is great for women who are approached by a stranger or group, but it also works for men, depending on the situation. When someone tries to start a conversation by asking if you are accompanied (or whatever), just reply, “Yes, my husband/father/friend is here with me.”
– Never provide personal information.
When someone asks, “Do you work here?” “What’s your profession?” or inquires about personal information, casually give vague replies such as “I work in commerce.” Another appropriate reply I’ve used successfully is, “I just got fired and am looking for a job.”
– Never reveal your personal status and financial condition.
It’s silly to try and pass as dispossessed, but if a stranger starts probing (inquiring about your stuff), for instance, if your watch, purse, or piece of jewelry is genuine, tell them it’s a cheap knock-off in a nonchalant tone.
– You’re a savvy local.
If someone asks you, “Is this your first time here?” you can just say, “No, I’m from here,” and go on your way. If they insist, tell them you’re expecting someone and want to be alone to cut the conversation. Try not to look like a tourist. Search places and get directions beforehand to avoid browsing a smartphone in public areas.
– Be vague, play dumb, and ask questions.
People are afraid to pass for fools, and some street folks know how to take advantage of that. Acting a little loony can be useful in some situations. Shooting back with questions is another great way to deflect and uncover information simultaneously without sounding menacing or intrusive. When it comes to delivery, be playful and relaxed or firm and decided, depending on how you choose to act.
Here’s more advice on how not to give out personal information.
#2 – ASSERT A BOUNDARY
A boundary is for your protection, so forget about someone else’s feelings. Get comfortable making people uncomfortable once they cross your boundaries. Be assertive: Don’t ask, don’t wait for further advancements, and be direct (“I need you to take a step away,” “I need to leave now”), firmly but without sounding nervous or raising your voice. Daisy wrote more about this here.
#3 – BE PATIENT
We live in an era of instant gratification and short attention spans. But some things can be rushed in the streets, and many others cannot. The situation has a vote: It dictates what we can (or should) and cannot (or shouldn’t) do.
When I’m out there as a homeless person, I have to bide my time and wait for the right opportunity to do something I want or need all the time. It’s a good exercise, so much so that I talk about it in my street survival training book.
#4 – BE OBSERVANT
Most people walking in public spaces or riding in buses and trains might be somewhat aware of their surroundings and not with their heads in the clouds, but that’s different from being actively observant.
Paying close attention to details and the environment can be a superpower, improving our safety and other aspects of our lives. It requires focus, commitment, and being fully 100% in the moment. It’s a skill that can be developed and improved with practice.
For instance, when riding in a taxi, memorize the color, license plate, and any outstanding details. It’s OK to take a picture if that helps or you cannot memorize everything at the moment, but keep paying attention: How is the car inside and outside? Does the driver have tattoos? Are they tidy and well-presented? Does he or she look intoxicated? Calm, nervous, or agitated?
Another example: when riding a bus or train, take a look before grabbing a handle or taking a seat. Does it look stained or wet? Is there something under the seat, a backpack, a paper bag, or any suspicious object?
#5 – USE EMPATHY TECHNIQUES
In the streets, it’s not uncommon to negotiate something or persuade someone to settle or find a solution to a problem, dispute, contentious matter, or even get out of trouble. Advanced empathy techniques can work well for that and lots more. They can be imperceptible and highly effective if applied properly and subtly to come out naturally.
Some say that’s manipulation, but if your safety and well-being are at risk then who cares, anything is acceptable. Consider this an introduction. Advanced social engineering techniques are a complex and extensive subject, but it is worth reading a few books and practicing to improve these valuable skills.
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Urban Survival Skill #1 - Leave urban areas